Drown or survive?

Do you know yourself? Really, know the parts of you that remain covered either in dust or behind a curtain, which time to time show up when you are sitting alone in your bedroom in the dark and your anxiety starts kicking in. You don’t know why, but you start feeling a shiver all over your body, and your eyeballs shift its place every nano second. It’s a sinking feeling, and you don’t know whether it is water you are drowning in or a wet mud pit. You just find it difficult to breathe. At this point, if anyone happens to question you on what’s exactly happening to you, you are at loss of words, or rather unable to contemplate your own feelings. How difficult it can be to express yourself, is understood in such times. So, you lock yourself in the bedroom, put in earphones, play songs and stare at the ceiling while teardrops make their way out. It’s at these moments that you become acquainted with the fragments of yourself that broke and the period of time they did so. Then you, extend your hand to comfort yourself and let yourself know that you understand now. If this happens, then, YES you know yourself, in out. And that’s where all the strength comes from, but only after seeing yourself hit the rock bottom.